Omegle Troll Conversations 2.0

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hello!
Question to discuss:
whats going on outside??
Stranger: Man..
You: not much
Stranger: It's bad outside...
Stranger: They're swarming us right now...
Stranger: I'm not sure if we can hold out few days longer.
Stranger: We're out of water supplies, and food isn't any better.
You: zombies!?!
Stranger: How are you hanging over there?
Stranger: Haven't you heard?
Stranger: Some viral infection caused all infected people to a cannibalistic frenzy.
Stranger: I've barricaded myself with my family.
Stranger: Police is trying to handle them, but...
You: where is the outbreak?
Stranger: In Croatia
Stranger: and Bosnia
Stranger: It started yesterday.
Stranger: We're not allowed to go outside
You: what continent is that in?
Stranger: Europe..
You: are those cities?
Stranger: No, countries
You: I'm failing at geography right now
Stranger: Man, I don't know how's this gonna end
Stranger: Police is losing control
Stranger: And army isn't bothering to come
You: is europe east or west of asia?
Stranger: You must be American
Stranger has disconnected.

At the end I imagined a "You must be new here" picture halp I am being swallowed by shitty memes

How meni swag is 2 meni?

Stranger 2: ?
Stranger 1: -No comment-
Stranger 2: lol
Stranger 1: SWAG- Secretly We Are Gay (I have no problem with gays)
Stranger 2: -.-
Stranger 1: Meni means?
Stranger 2 has disconnected

I have no idea what the fuck was going on here tbh

Question to discuss:
Kik N.U.D.E to trade nudes. Huge collection of original content. Pic for pic. Video for 10 pics.

You: Oh boy
You: How could I refuse that offer
You: What about 10 pics for a video?
You: Is this like trading Yu-Gi-Oh cards?
You: Will you take my Blue Eyes White Dragon for pictures of women of colour?
Stranger: cool guy
Stranger: I will.
Stranger: Take 2 Forbidden Lances, 2 Fiendish Chains and a ottomless Trap Hole for a nude.
Stranger: I am not even kidding.
You: Send it to me at 420 Swag Street Yolomerica, my name is Paul Beenis
Stranger: Or.
Stranger: I would trade a secret rare Judgement for a Lance and common Judgement.
Stranger: Actually.
Stranger: No.
Stranger: That card is worth like £10.
Stranger: It's nice to have.
Stranger: Plus, traded my ulti Thought Ruler for that.
Stranger: A few other cards too.
You: Well, I'm out. Bye stranger, it was fun.
Stranger has disconnected.

Question to discuss:
If you woke up tomorrow as the opposite sex...whats the first thing you'd do and why?

You: What I'd normally do I guess
Stranger: jump up and down with my big ol' titties
You: No wait, go on omegle and post stupid shit about kik'ing me
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: so true
Stranger has disconnected.

Question to discuss:
Why are white girls the easiest sluts? Black guys in my University say they're easy to fuck. They're also self centered, spoiled and act like they're entitled. I've noticed this from my experience.

I can't tell if stranger was serious or not in this next one, but oh boy

Stranger: The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout "Save us!"... and I'll look down and whisper "No."
You: Best response
Stranger: You smile and think "if I just stood up and went to sit next to her.." but you don't, you look outside again. A single raindrop trickles down the window, to end its journey alone. Just like you.
You: Das okay she was a slut anyway
You: being white, and all
Stranger: atleast she's not a cool guy though
Stranger: so she's like, worth something
Stranger: to society
You: Black people are good slaves
You: Also their dances are funny
Stranger: Well ofcourse they are good slaves
Stranger: they were made to be slaves
Stranger: look at africa
Stranger: show me how much cool guys achieve in independent work, no significant techonological advance, no mathematics, no sewer systems, no nothing.
Stranger: And they had like a 500,000 year head start
Stranger: but NOOOO
Stranger has disconnected.

Question to discuss:
Can I jizz in your mouth?

You: No, no you can not. Unless you pay.
Stranger: Do you want to live....
You: But I ain't cheap, I'm one of those expensive ho's
You: Like fucking, 10 dollars for that shit or something idk
Stranger: Don't you think that's a bit much?
You: Nah man, I have a quality bod
You: bitches love these stretch marks I got from birthing triplets
Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: Maybe it would be best not to then
You: Anyway, PEACE.
You have disconnected.

SirPwnington wrote:
Stranger 1: SWAG- Secretly We Are Gay (I have no problem with gays)

i almost choked on my own voicebox

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi, this is Dan
Stranger: o gosh?
Stranger: really?
Stranger: DAN?
Stranger: i was waiting like
Stranger: YEARS
Stranger: for this moment
Stranger: my mom will NEVER BELIEVE THIS SHIT
Stranger: i am chatting with DAN
Stranger: oke oke...i need t ocalm down..
Stranger: aehm..
Stranger: hi Dan..how are you?
You: I'm alive
Stranger: well
You: IM ALIVE
Stranger: how come?
Stranger: HOW COME?
You: Dan was on fire a while back.
You: Got that under control tho
Stranger: on his back?
You: So now things are going great!
Stranger: poor dan's back
You: Back, hair, legs, it was all bad
Stranger: well
Stranger: i wish the best
Stranger: for recovery
Stranger: for dan
Stranger: we all know
Stranger: his right leg was important to him
You: I'm fine man
Stranger: so if it is burned
Stranger: i dunno
You: I'm dan the man with a meidcal plan
Stranger: sure?
Stranger: need any help?
Stranger: a shoulder to cry?
You: Naw, I got bandaids
Stranger: SOME1 TO TRUST?
You: Yes
Stranger: cause i am here for ya bro
Stranger: i am here
You: I need to confide in you
You: I'm not really dan.
You: I DONT KNOW WHO I AM BUT IM NOT DAN
Stranger: wwwttttfff
Stranger: but
Stranger: then..MY whole WORLD
Stranger: is shattered
Stranger: wtf?
You: Someone told me I was DAN
Stranger: i was sure..
Stranger: you were dan
Stranger: BUT
Stranger: you are not?
You: And I'm here playing as DAN but I know I can't really be dan...
Stranger: ..but.
Stranger: but..
You: Who was I before this happened to me
You: What did I like
Stranger: deep inside you..maybe..really deep
Stranger: you are a dan
You: Was I a dancer?
Stranger: as we alll are dans
Stranger: deep inside
You: Did I enjoy photography?
You: We're all dans... you're right about that.
Stranger: i am left
Stranger: btw
Stranger: blem*
You: You are left?
Stranger: handed*
You: That's fine with me.
Stranger: well
Stranger: i guess
Stranger: but you know what is the bad thing?
You: I don't even like pickles though.
Stranger: dan would not be oke with it..
Stranger: you are losing your way man
Stranger: you are losing it
You: The answer is 14.
Stranger: nope
Stranger: it is the root of 14
You: I don't know how many birds can fit in that jar, what kinda birds?
Stranger: they changed it
Stranger: cause of the crisis
Stranger: depends on their stripes?
You: I have a bigger tv than him.
Stranger: nope
Stranger: he has a vrc
Stranger: and i was always told
Stranger: to be purple
You: Don't they have 9 toes or some shit?
Stranger: than sorry
You: Staples, thats what I forgoet.
Stranger: forgot*
You: Thanks
Stranger: you forgot how forgot is spelled*
You: Oh shit!
Stranger: but now..
Stranger: i dunno
You: I can rebuild.
You: We can make this work
Stranger: can you?
Stranger: CAN WE?
You: I'm sorry I told you everything about my life, things you never needed to know.
You: But think of the children
You: How will nathaniel and superfly react?
Stranger: i can't think of children
Stranger: they are no children anymore..dan
You: Oh yeah that thing you did back in the day
Stranger: for how long have you been sleeping?
Stranger: in the cryogenesis factos?
Stranger: years passed man
Stranger: they are no kids anymore
Stranger: i used to do it at night
Stranger: that thing
You: How long HAVE I been gone? 15years? 30? ....my whole life?
Stranger: well
Stranger: if it was whole life
Stranger: you would be dead
Stranger: so for sure not whole
You: JUST PASS THE SPAGHETTI SAUCE
Stranger: I AIN"T GOT IT
Stranger: AND YOU KNOW IT
Stranger: so stop ASKING ME
Stranger: for 88 years
Stranger: this sauceI EVEN HATE IT
You: WHAT? I'm fucking done with you. You never have anything
Stranger: gosh..
Stranger: i had 1 thing...
You: You offered me love, a shoulder to cry on, TRUST.
Stranger: the secret recipe
Stranger: I STILL HAVE RECIPE
You: And now i cant even get a bologny sandwich
Stranger: and the pumpkins..
Stranger: have grown dan
Stranger: i wish you could see em
You: The pumpkins HAVE grown haven't they?
Stranger: they are like
Stranger: YES
Stranger: they have
Stranger: but
Stranger: you know what they say
You: I do.
Stranger: if a pumpkin grows
Stranger: is means but things
You: A dick in the ass is worth two in the bush.
Stranger: for the crows
Stranger: and we got no crows
Stranger: bope
Stranger: screw dicks and asses
Stranger: we are talking business here
You: No crows?
Stranger: nope
You: No pumpkins?
Stranger: they all died
You: no children?
Stranger: mom made the msoup
Stranger: we have soup
Stranger: crow soup
Stranger: wanna?
You: ya man fo sho
You: hook it up
Stranger: *gives soup*
You: *eats soup*
Stranger: *RELAX..you gonna choke*
You: My soul is rebuilding thanks to mom's soup.
You: *chokes and stuff*
Stranger: *pats on back*
You: *coughs up bird foot*
Stranger: *you coughed blood\*
Stranger: *and foot*
You: I think that thing had a talon on it
Stranger: well
Stranger: wtf
Stranger: mom said
Stranger: and it was the prise
Stranger: good god
You: Y'know what, mom lied to us!
Stranger: you lucky
Stranger: what?
Stranger: WHAT?
You: She said everything was going to be ok!
You: DOES THIS LOOKIN FREAKING OK TO YOU?
Stranger: but it was not oke..
Stranger: NOT IT DOES NOT
Stranger: WHERE ARE THE PUMPKINS?
Stranger: WHRE ARE THEY?
You: WHERE IS THE SPAGHETTI SAUCE
Stranger: and the corws..
Stranger: crows*
You: and the kids
Stranger: ye the sauce too
You: THEY ALL DIED BUT WHY
Stranger: well the kids
Stranger: ATE THE SAUCE
Stranger: wtf
Stranger: that's why noone has seen em
Stranger: for ages
You: Fucking school food.
You have disconnected.

kik has fucking destroyed omegle. most of the spy mode OPs are just "kik me @ largepenishaver1999" or some shit like that

Omg Rahv, that was gold